When the adoption began to look like it was going to happen sooner rather than later, we realized that this was God's plan all along. We were not moving to Manhattan. As crazy as moving there with 3 girls seemed, it seemed even crazier to move there with a new special needs baby in tow. Here in Michigan, we have a support system. Close friends and family that are there when we need them. Sure, we would have
Communitas in NYC, but that wouldn't be the same as the relationships that we have here in Michigan. It also meant that an 800 sq ft two bedroom apartment would not be as doable as we thought it would be. That on top of many other factors, we knew we weren't moving to Manhattan. I'll save all of that for another day.
But now that we weren't moving to NYC, where were we moving? Somewhere else? In Michigan? Troy? Detroit? An apartment? Our old house? Both Pete and I agreed that we wouldn't make a decision until we both felt the same way. This left us in limbo for quite a few months. The most logical thing for us to do was to move back into the old house. The lease on that was not up until March 31, 2009 so we knew we had a few months to try to figure things out and hear from God.
By January I was sure that we were moving back to Troy. I thought our old house. But just to be sure, I thought we should look at buying another house. Pete agreed so I started talking with a real estate agent in February and looking at foreclosures. This only felt right if it was happening so that we get a great deal. We could potentially find a bigger house with 4 bedrooms, in a better school district, for less money. Eventually we went through the offering and declining process on two different houses. Both in Troy, essentially the same houses, with one slightly larger. Our prayer was always that if this was not the plan, the He would close the door. And close the doors he did. When we lost the offer on the second house to a lower bid, it was obvious that this was not His plan for us. But now what? Pete still felt drawn to D. Some days I do too but I'm not ready for that yet. Not now.
We again agreed (for those that know us both well, you know that us agreeing on anything is a big step in of itself : ) that we'd wait until we returned from China to make a final decision. We had an agreement with our renters now that the lease was ending, that we'd both give each other as close to 60 days notice as possible. They were in their own limbo and weren't prepared to re-new the lease either.
After 1.5 weeks in China, I just knew that we were supposed to move back into the old house. As frustrating as that idea was (having sold 80% of our belongings, of which we now need to buy at least 40% back again) it felt like the right thing to do. I needed safety, simplicity, and security. I know Troy. I know that house. Since we had prepped that house to sell originally, I knew that it wouldn't need much work. Maybe some painting and cleaning, but nothing else. Now if only Pete would feel the same way.
Eventually Pete came to same the conclusion. We'd move back into the old house. But not our old lives. Things have to be different this time around. We've released our attachment to 'stuff' and vowed not to accumulate so much again. We also know our lives need to mean more than our usual surburbia living. We don't know exactly what that means yet, but have faith that God will show us, step by step. He has already started to reveal a little by our growing involvement in the Cass Corridor area of Detroit.
Pete contacted our renters and terminated our lease. Because we don't have an exact move out date, we told them that we can be a little flexible with the beginning of May. I'm hoping to back in and settled for Mother's Day. But I also know not to count on what I want either.
follow-up and stay on the Nexium in the meantime to see if it decides to work. She can only take it for 8 weeks and we are starting week 3 already with zero changes.
